Ahhh yes Monday, how I love you. But lets be really honest here. Who loves Mondays? Surely not me. Monday means the end to the weekend and that makes me sad and today it makes me tired. But, I did have a very nice weekend so I can't complain too much. Mother's day was very nice. My boys did very good this year! Buddy made me a candle holder at school and he was sooo proud of it. Sam got me a bracelet, and new "rims" for the red rocket and he treated for dinner for our whole family, he also got gifts for mom and Haley as well! That boy is doing a good job! It was a nice day and so nice to just be with the people that I love. I've had this annoying eye twitch in my left eye for over a week now. I have been warned of Bell's Palsy but so far I have none of the other symptoms (which is good) However, man an eye twitch might be one of the most annoying things ever. I'm going to try to go to bed early tonight to see if that helps. Maybe this whole thing is just that I have been dieting, working out, stressed at work, not too much sleep, and I am just dragging through the days...that could be it. I think I need a massage and a haircut, but that is a whole other story. I'm honestly considering acupuncture. It seems to be a cure all. But we'll see. I didn't do so hot this week on my diet. There were definitely days where I felt awesome, like the day I hit 144. Then my mom and dad came into town and dinners out happened. So this morning I was back at 146 which sucks. I hate that a few indulgences really do effect you. I really need to get my butt in gear at the gym as well but honestly have felt somewhat fatigued so I don't think I have been giving it my all. I am eating plenty but am thinking I need to add in a multi-vitamin just to combat the fatigue and stress and other life happenings. I feel like I have lots of awesome posts planned hopefully I will get around to writing them :) In the meantime I will give you a happy little snapshot of Monday blessings.... The three most important blessings in my life! 1. I am blessed to be the mommy of such a sweet and bratty little man! I love this boy so much. I cannot even begin to imagine my life without him. Even when he tells me that I am mean and that when he grows up he is going to move away from me so I won't be mean to him. I love him even when he throws a fit because he doesn't want to wear the shirt I picked out for him. I love this boy because he is my baby and because when I cry he wipes my tears and tells me it will be ok. He gives sweet kisses and hugs and I just love him! 2. My mommy and daddy. I truly, truly believe that I have been blessed with the best parents ever! My mom and dad have supported me through every event in my life. They love me unconditionally and they love Buddy! And I can honestly say Buddy is the luckiest boy ever to have them for grandparents!!! 3. Even though I moan and groan sometimes about Sam, he has really stepped up and made us super happy! I love that he loves Buddy and Buddy absolutely adores him! I am blessed! xoxo

Ok, so I have been meaning to post some updated photos but never seem to have the time. So I made some tonight. Some shots from Easter...we are happy! Ahhhh I love my family!! xoxo H~

Oh happy day, its Friday y’all! I love Fridays, I love that today is really the start to the weekend and that my work week is almost over. I’m also pretty excited that I have been doing so good going to the gym and with my program. Baby steps ya know! For my Friday high five I guess that I just want to tell you that I am really thankful for everything that I have. I am happy where I am right now, even if where I am is a weird and tiresome place. My hermitness is ok with me today in this moment. xoxo 1. My sometimes annoying but sweet Sam and I have been together for two years. On our first date we went to an Irish Pub and Sam ordered me a Blue Moon with Orange juice. (that is beer) If you know me you know I hate beer. However on this occasion I drank it. When I was done he asked me if I wanted another one… I smiled and said no thank you. He said, “you didn’t like it?” I said “I really don’t like beer”…him…”Well why didn’t you tell me”…me…”I was being polite”… hee hee two years has had its ups and downs, and every day is not roses but I am thankful for this man who loves me and Easton. We love him with all our hearts! 2. Breakfast today…so yummy Cinnamon French Toast with blue berries, raspberries, and bananas! It was tasty! 3. My sweet boy, I just love him. He has not gotten out of his bed during the night once this week. I am so thankful for the full nights sleep! And I must say I love his hugs and kisses in the morning! 4. I took Buddy over to see Lucas and “his” baby Emma this week. Buddy just loved her so. He held her and gave her kisses. I’m hoping that visiting with the baby will cure his baby fever for a while.  The boy just wants a baby brother or sister so bad. 5. Tomorrow is Julia’s last softball game this season. I am so proud of her for the player that she is! She has improved so much and try’s so hard. Of course I am super excited that she loves softball! She is growing up to be an amazing young lady and I love her so much! Hope your Friday makes you smile and that you take a moment to truly enjoy and cherish the blessings that you have! xoxo - Heather

Hee hee... you know, in theory you would think that if you couldn't do your job while you were at work but had to stay there it would be kinda fun. You could surf the net, talk to people, you know just hang out. But in reality, not being able to work while at work is kind of boring. I have read all the blogs I follow, checked out facebook, pinterest is partly down as well so that sucks (especially when its the pictures that don't show up)So that is really no fun. It is actually pretty interesting that our server is down and we cannot work but our internet works...go figure. So what is a girl to do...blog of course. If only I were at home...then I could put up an awesome picture post, but alas I am stuck at my work computer. So here is what I'm going to do. I am going to do a picture post photos from my cell phone. Are you excited now. Ha ha you should be because I am going to post 15 pictures that is what I am saying right now...you see, I have no idea what the first 15 pictures are on my cell phone but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway... Not that you will notice the time between the point I am writing this and the point that the pictures are loaded but I am going to tell you anyway..give me a second while I upload my 15 pictures... This is taking longer than I thought...bear with me.. ahh ok here we go, they uploaded on here a little random but I will just sit back and let you enjoy my amazing photography skills on my blackberry... My sweet boy.. We did yard work on Sunday and cleaned the pool, it was so warm that Buddy got in...he said it wasn't cold but I don't really believe that, and no I did not feel the water to be sure Oh this is a picture of our new weed whacker...this bad boy is awesome.. it is super easy to use and I love it! This is a picture of the planter next to our swimming pool. Prior to this picture it was filled with Aloe Vera plants they were ugly and smelly and I don't like them so I pulled them all out. Next I will dig out more of the dirt add new soil and pretty flowers. Stay tuned and I'll post pics when its done. This is a pic of Buddy and myself toasting ice cream sandwiches before we had our Saturday night movie night. We watched a cowboy movie...I won't tell you the title...just because i don't want to :) This was a yummy cupcake my sister made it was peanut butter delightfulness. So yummy. She has started her own little business and I am so excited for her. Future post alert... I will be doing a whole post on her cupcakes with yummy pics! Here is my boy... so handsome! By the way did I mention he is a pirate? These pictures are prior to our sword fight. I am a bigger badder pirate, I won! Then he shot me with his slingshot Here is his robot made out of recycled items for school. He was so proud! ahh gotta love when gas is only $4.05 right? Yes I am that mom who takes pictures of her baby sleeping...sue me... he is way to cute not to! This was in the drive thru at Jack in the Box in Brawley on our way home from Glamis. He did not want me to take his picture. Man I love this kid! Lastly this is my boy working hard at mommy's office. So there you have it, a picture post with the first 15 pictures out of my cell phone. Aren't you glad you read my blog today :) Btw, my server is still down and I am officially bored. Hope you are having an amazing day! xoxo, Heather

To say that the last two weeks have been stressful would be an understatement. In all reality the last two months have really been hell on wheels. But who’s keeping track? I would love to say that I am blissfully happy and that I have lost 10 pounds and all is right with the world but I can’t. I truly feel that if I am going to blog I must only blog the truth. That being said, I am trying my hardest to have a positive outlook on things and know that this time and these situations will not last forever and that there are brighter days ahead. I truly feel as though we go through seasons in our lives. Seasons where we change, view or act differently. I feel as though I am in the hermit mode. Not that I don’t want to leave my house or anything, but that I only feel the need to be with or talk to my family, go to work and get that done and go home. I obviously have added the gym to my routine but I go there and really don’t talk to anyone and am just in my world. I AM NOT DEPRESSED. I just feel like sometimes I am pulled in a million different directions. Everyone wants something or needs something and right now I don’t feel like I have it to give. This is in many aspects of my life right now from work, to ministry, to friends. I just feel overwhelmed. So the only way that I can make things ok for myself is to just be. I don’t have extra for anyone. Does this sound selfish? It isn’t intended to be that. It just is where I am. I just feel the need for anonymity. That sounds a little contradictory seeing as how I am blogging right now, but really, I’m sitting at a computer in my own zone. So really I could say just about anything. And the thing about it is that while you are reading it you can judge it anyway you want and most likely you will not comment and you can think what you want and I will be none the wiser. Kinda how I like it right now. Yikes! Don’t get me wrong there have been beautiful times over the last few months. We had a great Easter! I had been praying especially hard about the Easter service and that the words would be just right. And quiet honestly it was perfect. I think God had us in that place on that Sunday for a reason. It was truly a blessing to be there. The music was AMAZING and I even caught Sam singing along with the worship songs. That made me smile! My parents have found this amazing church in San Dimas and I am so happy that they have found it. I look forward to going as many times as possible. Christs Church of the Valley, so glad they found it! We also had a fun time recently out at Glamis. Buddy had a great time playing with new friends and we took his motorcycle out there as well. Although I have to say I’m pretty sure that he could make friends with anyone. I’ve decided that today is what you make it. I plan on making it great. I have a day full of meetings and then I’ll be headed to the gym. I do have this secret that I am not ready to share yet. I think in the end it is going to be something that makes me extremely happy. I hope that those people who do read this will know that right now and this season…its nothing personal its just where I am. I love this boy! He is the light of my life! xoxo, Heather

Well it came. My 35th birthday. The picture above is the birthday cake that Sam bought me. Yes, I ate a teeny tiny square of it. Really it was small! But, it was yummy! Honestly if it weren’t for Facebook you know that most people would not even know it was your birthday, that might have been better. Then they wouldn't know that I am no longer a sweet young thing. Hee hee. I'm not that sweet! My mom and dad gave me a super cute dress that hopefully my skinny self can wear this summer, a meatloaf pan that takes out the fat and a new holder for my bible. Sam so nicely did the brakes on my Expedition and got me a new MP3 player so that I can listen to music when I go to the gym. He also bought that yummy cake and took us all out to dinner. It was a nice birthday! I jumped eagerly on my scale at 5:15 this morning…NOT! Well I did get on the scale but not eagerly. I was happy with a 5lb. loss! Although I know that the first 5 are the easiest 5 to lose. So I know that this week I cannot expect to lose the same. My weight as on this morning was 150.0 yuck! So I don’t really want to give myself a number goal for this week. Instead I would like to shoot for 2 to 4 pounds gone but while those are numbers I’m looking more to goal myself at being at the gym at least 4 times this week. I really want to focus on toning and losing at the same time. Last summer I lost 10 pounds just from lowering my calorie intake. But since my goal is for shorts this summer I need to be in the gym or doing some sort of exercise at least 4 times a week. Hitting the gym at 5:30am sucks! I’m tired but I’m getting used to it. Its a choice right? Maybe one day I’ll like it. Maybe one day I’ll get smart and go to bed early the night before I’m gonna go. Then my eyes and face wouldn’t look so tired and wrinkly. Time for Botox. Ha ha, just kidding…sort of. So hopefully this week I can keep up with all that I am trying to achieve. I bought myself a pair of goal shorts so once I reach those I will feel like I’ve done it and accomplished something. Hopefully I can wear them this summer. I am not good with slow progression. I did make sure that I did not have any grey hair going into my 35th year. Yeah, black is back baby. Grey is gone forever…errr well at least for the next 4 weeks. 35, I’m not super excited about it. It feels older than 34. Heck, it is really close to 40 and I am not anywhere close to where I wanted to be. But I know I’m not ready for 40, and the last five years flew by. I’m kind of scared. I’m hoping that 35 will bring more wisdom. Better choices and a skinnier me. I am working on all of those. So I guess we’ll see. Hey, I’m a work in progress. Hopefully I’ll be finished soon! My sweet buddy! I love him! Best gift I ever received! I am blessed beyond measure! So here's to another 35 years and then some! xoxo, Heather

If you know me then you know that there are certain things that I am particular about. I like things the way I like them and I very rarely go out without make up on. I’m kind of like the cover of those magazines where you see pictures on celebrities without their make up only I am not a celebrity, but I look just as bad. I’d tell you that I feel bad about being vain, but it isn’t really true. I don’t want people to see me looking haggard. I am in no way perfect and I am not trying to portray myself that way, but I do care about my appearance and I want to feel good about myself. I won’t lie, I look in the mirror a lot. When I walk by one yes I do check myself out. I look to make sure that those hairs that want to stand straight up are not. I look to make sure that I have nothing in my teeth, and I look to make sure all the rolls and such are covered and that I look presentable. If people were really honest with themselves I think that they would admit that they check themselves out as well. I actually find it a little odd that there are so many people who really don’t care about how they look and walk around looking like they just woke up. I know I’m a bad person. You don’t have to tell me. But seriously, I just don’t get it. I saw a lady walking her son to school the other day in her pajama pant with a hooded sweatshirt walking across main street smoking a cigarette. This was at 8am. Personally, I wouldn’t be out and about in my jammies. But come on, you need a nicotine fix that bad that you do while walking your son to school. I don’t get it. I guess that I just care more than some people. And honestly I don’t think that it has anything to do with self confidence and being confident in your own true inner beauty. I have plenty of self confidence and I still would not walk out of my house with at least eye brows painted on my face. So honestly what does that say about me? I know that this way of thinking is not necessarily the popular way to think but I do. I like my clothes to look nice, my make up to be good, and my hair done. I may at times relax a little on one of these things… I might put my hair in a braid or wear less make-up or dress casual, but for the most part I think I’m pretty put together. Sometimes I take it to the extreme, however as I say extreme I mean that you might think it is extreme to drive to work wearing flat shoes and then I change into my high heels when I get to work. I however, do not think that this is extreme. I think of it as being practical. #1 I don’t want to ruin the back of my heels by driving in them, and #2, I have to walk from a parking structure to my car and I’d prefer to be in flats. So where exactly am I going with all of this? Well recently I decided that 155lbs was just not acceptable for me anymore. I have only weighed this much when I was pregnant with buddy and just after I had him. And while in clothing I may not look huge I see things in the mirror before I get dressed that would make you scream with horror. I don’t like the roll that hangs over my pants when I sit down. I don’t like the fact that I pretty much always need to wear an extra tank top underneath things to tone down the spare tire that I’ve been carrying around since buddy came. I also would like to have one summer where I can wear shorts and be happy with how I look. Plus, if I were to get into a bathing suit today I might pass out from the grossness that I would see. Am I over exaggerating? No! Would this bother everyone? No. But like I said this is something that matters to me. To me it has become about making the choice. Going to the gym, getting up at the ass crack of dawn to go, hell it isn't even dawn. It’s pitch black outside when I go. But I’m making that choice. I want to see results. I want to wear shorts. I’m choosing to eat better and do what I need to do to lose the weight that I want to. One thing is for sure there will be sweat and tears, and if I don't lose weight there will be blood after I kick my own ass. Vanity is not a good thing…in theory, but to not care in my opinion would be worse.